I'm not an optimistic person.

I can't help but be sad that I can't see her.
But I still can't help but just smile uncontrollably sometimes.
Every time I remember,
the kisses,
the hugs,
holding hands,
pulling her out of math class,
how we both despise the bell,
the things only we know,
staying up until 2am talking to her,
yellow roses,
everything.
I am not an optimistic person.
This is such an odd feeling.