Rantings?

I've discovered I need to stop putting a name to everything,
I need to learn to enjoy what I have,
and stop trying to figure out every aspect of it,
I need to admit i'm wrong sometimes,
and I need to learn to apologize,
i'm getting better about all these things,
and learning more things I need to fix about myself,
I'm learning to realize when i'm being stubborn,
it's stopped a few fights,
however with all the improvements i'm making,
there is some back sliding going on,
my father keeps being mentioned,
and I keep remembering him being an alcoholic,
and I wonder if i'll follow in his footsteps,
I highly doubt I will,
honestly though it is fun,
I highly doubt it would ever get out of hand,
I don't want to feel that way every morning,
waste my money on it every night,
turn into Red and have to call someone crying that i've pissed myself,
and that i'm lost somewhere.
Back to a lighter subject,
I've learned just how selfish i've been in some endeavors,
how needlessly angry I was at people,
and just how much of a hypocrite i've been at times,
again,
i'm working at fixing them,
however I fear some of the friendships i've lost are ones I can't earn back,
that doesn't mean I can't try,
however with a multitude of them,
i'm really not sure how to go about that...